"La vida mundana es irreal. Es ilusoria y transitoria. Es fútil y vana. Su fin es únicamente el polvo. No hay en ella nada que hacer más que charlar, chismosear,comer y dormir. Todo es ilusorio y doloroso. Todo es transitorio y fugaz. La experiencia mundana no encierra ningún valor ni realidad. Sólo la Luz es real."
I drove to the hospital and talked with doctor Mankiewicz and he told me something that really surprised me. He said I was still a virgin when I gave birth, he said my hymen was intact, like I said, I was a virgin so what the doctor said didn't surprised me really but it was scary because, if I wasn’t rape, how I got pregnant? I drove to see my gynecologist and explain her everything that happened to me and he told me that sometimes hymen doesn’t break after having sex; they call it elastic hymen and it's very hard to break so there's a possibility that I had this elastic hymen and got pregnant by having normal sex. On the other hand I had a Caesarean operation because, due to my conditions I could not give birth in a normal way, dilatation was not enough. In my way home I thought about all these things that I heard today and then another question came to me. Because of the fact that you must use a sperm to get pregnant; there’s a possibility that I was raped, but the problem is that I don't remember being raped, so what is the explanation for my sudden pregnancy? 5 April All these days, I’ve been thinking and trying to remember anything that could help me clear my doubts, but nothing. Anyways it has been really hard for me to take care of the baby and at the same time study and trying to find the answer for my unknowing pregnancy. I have already left my job and my mom is helping me with the baby but this mystery is killing me.